Sunday, December 29, 2013

Reflections on 2013

The end of the year is often a time to reflect on the year that is coming to a close and think ahead to the new one. 2013 was a year I’d rather not repeat. It wasn’t all bad, and there were some pretty awesome times, but there were a lot of times when I’d ask myself “what’s next?”…and not because I thought it would be something pleasant. January was pretty ordinary. February was pretty good until the end when Justin deployed a couple days before my birthday. Corey and I got back into our routine while Justin was having a deployment that was definitely not boring (though I would have been okay with boring). March and April went by pretty fast, as did most of May. Toward the end of May, the Burdette side of the family welcomed a new member when Cole married Nikki. Then came June. It’s been a rollercoaster since then. But for each difficulty, there has been something to be thankful for. Justin got his legs blown off, but he’s still alive. His injuries could have been a lot worse, but they weren’t. My dad’s place of employment decided to downsize and my dad was laid off after working there 30+ years. Because of his age and years of service, he qualified for early retirement status…something that couldn’t have happened if he had been laid off a year ago. My sister’s husband got in a car accident (other driver was at fault), but he wasn’t injured. The driver that hit him didn’t have a valid driver’s license, but amazingly he had insurance. Two things to be thankful for. Justin’s brother was riding his motorcycle and was hit by a car. He sustained minor injuries, but he was wearing his helmet (actually Justin’s helmet which we were glad that he had and was wearing), so he was a lot better off than he would have been without it. My grandmother had a mini-stroke not too long before Thanksgiving. We’re thankful it wasn’t worse than it was, but we still aren’t sure what effects from it are only temporary and which are permanent. The doctors are still working with her to find out what medications will help her situation. One medication did not react well with her, and we had to call for an ambulance on Christmas day. She is now out of the hospital and she and Poppa will be staying with my parents for a bit while she’s recovering. Please pray that she will make a full recovery from the stroke and that the doctors will have wisdom in treating her. Please also pray for her as she’s having difficulty understanding and remembering what’s going on and is worried and anxious about a lot of things.

There were a lot of things that made 2013 a rough year, but there are also a lot of things that happened that gave us a lot of good memories to treasure. Corey finished his first year in the Awana program as a Puggle. He also got to play in his first team sport…even though his season was cut short due to Justin getting injured. He got to play in practices and in one game. As I already mentioned, I gained a new sister-in-law, and Corey and I were able to be at their wedding. My sister, Krista, and I took a road trip together down to Florida for the wedding/mom and Wendy’s birthdays and had a lot of fun. (“Look, there’s a Chick-fil-a!” lol) Justin found out that even though he was injured, he’d still be able to hunt and fish and wouldn’t have to wait on getting prosthetics to do so…huge morale boost for him. Justin was able to participate in a fly fishing tournament the weekend before his birthday…just 2 ½ months post injury. He had a great time and caught a lot of fish. I can’t say enough about how great Project Healing Waters has been for Justin. Between the weekly fly tying and the fishing trips here and there, they’ve helped him get back into one of the hobbies that he loves. And the people who make it happen are some of the nicest people you could meet. We got to go as a family to Sharptown, MD and enjoy some time away from Walter Reed, met some amazing people who treated us like family and welcomed us with open arms into their community…oh, and Justin shot some does and we got to stock our freezer with venison. Minor details. Lol And going there wasn’t just a one-time thing and they forgot about us – it was a “give us a call and come back anytime” thing. We went back about a month after the Heroes Haven event and had a wonderful time then too. They even threw Corey a little birthday party complete with a camouflage cake. We were able to drive down to Georgia to attend the homecoming ceremony for Justin’s guys. I was probably more emotional for that homecoming than the ones where I was welcoming Justin home. Lol It was so good to finally be able to meet the men who were up there with Justin and made sure he didn’t bleed out after he was hit. I also got to meet some of the wives – many of whom I had spoken to on the phone but had never met in person. Even though Justin had been back in the States for months, this was his first time back in our house and back on Ft. Stewart. He only beat his guys back by a few days. It was so great to see him in uniform on the field with his guys and the rest that came home that day. We were able to drive down to Florida to be with our families for Thanksgiving. This was the first time Justin had been in Florida since January and the first time since May for me. It was so good to be with family even though the trip went by way too fast. Justin and I were able to go to Texas for a hunting trip at the San Rafael Ranch. We both had a great time, made some new friends that hopefully we’ll see again down the road, made some great memories (and got some fun pictures), and I even shot a hog…something most people never thought I’d do. Shoot, I never thought I’d do it either. Lol I was content shooting paper targets at the range. Shortly after our Texas trip, we drove back down to Florida to be with our families for Christmas. Our Christmas wasn’t at all what we expected, but we got to be together for it. Both of my sisters and their families were here. All of Justin’s siblings are here. I got to see one set of grandparents a couple days before Christmas, and the other set on Christmas day. I’m also glad that I’m here and able to help out with Grandma even though I’d rather be spending time with her under better circumstances. I feel so helpless when stuff happens and I’m out of state (and formerly out of the country). Grandma was upset and said that she feels she’s ruining things for me and for my mom and feels like a burden, but I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now. I’m thankful that she’s still alive and that I’m blessed with the opportunity to spend time with her still.

2013 has been a year of highs and lows. We’ve gotten to meet some amazing people (and even a few famous ones), do some really fun things, reconnect with old friends, feel the love and support from our families, friends, churches and communities. Looking back at the pictures from this year brings many laughs and smiles, and some tears here and there. Here’s to 2014 having less stress, fewer difficulties, more adventure, more healing, fewer surgeries for Justin, and hopefully seeing the end of our time at Walter Reed (though I know it won’t be any time soon). A belated Merry Christmas and a happy New Year to all of my friends! Thank you for being there for us and keeping us in your thoughts and prayers this year! We are truly blessed.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Our trip to Texas

Justin and I just got back from a hunting trip on a ranch in Texas. We had an amazing time there. The ranch is owned by a couple that are huge supporters of Project Healing Waters – the organization that Justin does the fly fishing with. All of the guests who were there with us were either on staff with PHW or were participants/spouses of participants – the majority being wounded warriors. Some had visible wounds, others not as much, but all have made sacrifices for our country. Many people would look at them with pity, others with curiosity, and some even with disgust. Some might call them handicapped. I look at them and see people who have overcome so much to get where they are today – and have many more obstacles still to overcome. Three of the men were amputees, though two were a lot further along in the healing process and if they were wearing long pants, you might not even know they had fake legs. Another of the men is paralyzed from the chest down. The rest had other wounds that you might not even notice, but all of them had a story and were united through their service, sacrifices and a wonderful organization that helped the ranch owners organize the trip.

After the smoothest experience with airline travel that we’ve ever had, we arrived in southern Texas and were driven to the San Rafael Ranch. We met the ranch owner, Loralee West, Loralee’s friend, Kathy, the ranch staff, and the other guests who had already arrived. We were shown to our guest house so that we could relax a bit before dinner. Every evening, we had appetizers which could have been a meal by themselves. Then came dinner of the five star quality variety. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten such a variety of amazing food in such a short period of time. I even tried elk for the first time and the second time and the third time and it was never prepared the same way twice. After dinner, they had us draw names to see which of the staff would take the hunters out for the early morning hunt. As I’m not a morning person, I slept in while Justin hunted. When the hunters got back in, we had breakfast. After breakfast, there was shooting sessions on three of the days and a horseback ride on the fourth. I skipped the shotgun session, but enjoyed the rifle and pistol sessions. The rifle session was both to have fun and to sight in the rifles we would be using to hunt to the trip. I shoot left handed and was able to use a left handed rifle for the first time. It made things so much easier. I had only shot a pistol once before, so it was nice to get some instruction. We had a little competition and Justin and I did pretty decent. Lunch was buffet style and let me tell you, they put out an awesome spread every day. Before lunch was over, we’d draw names for the afternoon/evening hunt. After lunch we had a couple hours to rest and relax before the hunting resumed. Then after hunting, we’d all meet up at the cleaning station to see what everyone shot. Then back to the main part of the ranch to get ready for dinner.

The first evening of hunting, Justin and I were together in a raised blind with one of the staff. We saw a lot of the exotic/non-native animals. It was so cool to watch them. Once again, I was thankful that I splurged a few years ago a bought myself a camera with a 26x zoom. Toward the end of the evening, a herd of wild hogs came into range, and Justin managed to shoot one (58 lbs). I had them in the sights of my rifle but wasn’t confident enough to take a shot. The next evening, Justin wanted to be in one of the ground blinds, so I went with one of the staff, Eddie, to the other raised blind hoping to get some more pictures of the exotics. I didn’t see as many that evening unfortunately. I saw a couple white tail bucks. One was too young to shoot but the other was a good aged 9 point that Eddie said I could shoot if I wanted. I had him in my sights and he was well within range, but I just couldn’t pull the trigger. He was just too pretty…though I would have had no problem with someone else shooting him. I was afraid I would just injure him and he’d run off. He eventually walked out of range. Then a herd of hogs showed up. They came into range and all stopped. Then they’d walk a little bit and stop. (According to Justin, it’s rare for hogs to stand still, but these piggies seemed to be posing for me.) After a few minutes of tracking them with my gun without pulling the trigger, I know Eddie must have thought they’d just walk away like the buck. I think I surprised both him and myself when I actually did shoot. I looked and saw that I had dropped the pig (43 lbs) and was in too much shock to get off a second shot at one of the others. lol Will I become an avid hunter now? Doubtful. I could take it or leave it honestly, but the look on Justin’s face when I told him made it totally worth it. The next morning, Justin finally got his buck. He’d been trying for years to shoot something with antlers to join his gator on the wall, and he finally got it. He got a nice sized 8 point. That evening, I got him to go back to the raised blind with me in hopes that the herd of pigs would come back. We waited and waited and finally three large hogs appeared about 200 yards away.  I’ve only ever shot at 100 yards, so I wasn’t confident that I could make the shot. Justin was a different story. He shot at the largest one – a boar. He hit it, but it ran away and we weren’t able to find it. Unlike me, he wasn’t too shocked to get off the next shot. This time he shot twice at a sow. She also ran off, but Eddie was able to find her (140 lbs). All in all, between the two of us, we had a successful hunting trip. The ranch owner paid for each person to have something mounted. Mine was too small (though not too small to eat and ended up on the lunch buffet on the last day), but Justin is getting his buck mounted.

By the end of the week, we made a bunch of new friends that I hope we will see again somewhere down the road. It was hard saying goodbye on Sunday. Some we bid farewell to at the ranch. Justin and I were on the same flight as 6 other people from the ranch, so we had a little longer to hang out with them in the airport and one was even across the aisle from us on the plane. After we got off the plane, we were met by the TSA agent who helped escort us to our next gate. We started off as a group heading in the same direction and at each place where one or two people broke off to go to their own gates, we took a few minutes to say goodbye. The TSA guy was pretty understanding at our delays. It was just that good of a time that we weren’t ready for it to end (and the weather in TX was so much nicer than what we were all heading to).

We’ve been blessed with so many opportunities that have helped Justin get back into his hobbies, get us away from the hospital, and just to have fun. Each one has been so different, but after each one, we’ve come away having made new friends, wonderful memories, and enjoyed ourselves to the fullest. I’m so thankful for the people who have given so much to help the wounded warriors and their families. It’s so good to see Justin back outdoors doing things he loves. He may have lost his lower legs, but he didn’t lose his spirit. He hasn’t let being in a wheelchair keep him from doing the things he loves, and I will forever appreciate the people who have helped make that happen.







Monday, December 9, 2013

Six months

Six months ago, it was a Sunday morning. My alarm went off telling me it was time to get up and get ready for church. I got up, fixed Corey’s breakfast and was starting to fix my own when my cell phone rang. It wasn’t unusual for Justin to call around that time because of the time difference between Afghanistan and Georgia, and it wasn’t unusual for him to call from a random international number that I didn’t recognize. I answered the phone, and sure enough, it was Justin. He told me he has some bad news for me. For him, bad news could mean anything from the commemorative rifle order not going through to getting orders that we would have to move somewhere that I didn’t want to live. Then he told me that he’s been in an explosion and had lost both legs above the ankle. My first response was “are you serious?” You see, Justin has a weird sense of humor sometimes and has joked for years about getting springy legs like the guy in the Olympics, so I thought he was joking with me. Then he said “yes, I’m serious” and I could hear the pain in his voice and realized it wasn’t a joke. It took me a minute, but I pulled myself together and reminded myself that at least he was alive and it could have been a lot worse. He told me he wanted Pastor Lou’s number (the pastor of the church we grew up in and still consider home) and we talked for a few minutes before he said he needed to call his parents and handed me off to the nurse to answer any questions I had. I was so thankful he had been coherent enough to call me himself so I could hear his voice and know he was alive. I was also thankful that he called his parents. That was one phone call that I didn’t want to make, and I know they would rather hear it from him so that they could hear his voice too. The nurse explained to me a little more of what had happened and medically what would be happening next. At this point I had a million things running through my head. My world got turned upside down, and I was struggling to figure out which way was up.

My first call was to talk to my parents. Given the time of day on a Sunday, I knew they were in choir at church. I tried my mom’s cell phone first – no answer. It was in her purse in the pew and she was in the choir loft. I tried several other numbers with no answer. Finally I tried my dad’s cell phone. A lot of times he leaves it at home on Sundays, so I knew it would be hit or miss as to whether he’d answer it either. Thankfully he had it on him and was able to pass it off to mom and they both slipped out of the choir loft. I told them what had happened, and even though they had just gotten back the day before from another trip, they said they’d be on their way as soon as they got home and threw their clothes back in the suitcases. They let a few people at Faith know what happened so they could be praying. One of them has a daughter who goes to our church in Georgia, so she passed it on and then our church in Georgia was praying too.

My next call was to my friend, Katie. She and her husband were two of the first people I met in Georgia after Justin and I got married. Neil and Justin deployed together for their first deployment and have been close friends since then. Katie and I became great friends from the first time we met practically and the four of us have kept in touch and finally we back together in the same duty station after we returned from Germany.  I told her what happened and she said they’d be over right away. I started to tell her that if I didn’t answer the door right away, to let themselves in, but then realized she’d already hung up the phone. They made it to my house in record time and stayed until right before my parents arrived. We laughed together, and we cried together. Katie helped me clean up the house while I was answering calls, emails, and Facebook messages. Neil was on the rear detachment, so he was making calls trying to find out more information for me.

After I got off the phone with Katie and called Justin’s parents, I went back out to Corey. He’s usually very sensitive to my emotions and saw that I’d been crying. He asked what made me cry. I told him that his daddy got hurt and that the bad guys had taken his legs. He handled it better than I did and gave me a big hug. He was excited that Mimi and Papa were coming to see us later that day and that Neil and Katie were on the way over.

Throughout the rest of the day, it was a blur of phone calls and sitting around waiting for more information. Justin was able to call again later in the day and they must have upped the dosage of pain meds because his pain was more under control and he was joking around. He asked to talk to Neil and joked with him about beating him in a PT test once he gets his springy legs. I felt a lot better after that call because he sounded so much better. One of the other phone calls was from one of the ladies whose husband was also deployed and saw Justin after he was injured. He told his wife that Justin was an inspiration. When she told me this, I nearly started laughing. Before he got hurt, nobody had ever used the word “inspiration” to describe him. He laughed when I told him…though I had to tell him a couple times before he was coherent enough to remember it. There’s a lot that he doesn’t remember from those first few weeks. Not long before my parents arrived, Pastor Steve from our church in GA came over to the house to talk to me and pray with me. While he was there, my parents arrived and were slightly confused when they saw two nearly identical trucks in the driveway.

The majority of that week was spent waiting for information. The Army information line was great at keeping us informed. While Justin was still in Afghanistan, he received his Purple Heart. I was emailed pictures from when he received it and that was the first I had seen of him since he was hurt. I had heard his voice, but what a relief to see him alive! When Justin was transferred to Germany, his platoon sergeant from when we were stationed in Vilseck was at the hospital waiting for him when his plane landed. Usually I hate that I have friends spread out so far because I can’t see them very often/ever, but on that day, I was thankful that we still have friends in Germany who could be with Justin even though I couldn’t. The next day, another friend (who had deployed with Justin in his first deployment, was a groomsman in our wedding, and later was stationed in Vilseck) visited Justin. I’m so thankful that these two drove about three hours each way to spend some time with him. I felt better that he wasn’t alone over there. I was also able to call Justin while he was in Germany. I could call the Army information line 24 hours a day and they could patch me through to the hospital in Germany. I woke Justin up nearly every time (though in my defense, he did sleep a lot due to meds…I was careful to take into account the time difference before calling) and he joked that I was getting him back for all the times he woke me up during his deployments.

While we were waiting to hear that Justin would be transported back to the States, I was overwhelmed at the outpouring of love from family, friends, our churches in Florida and Georgia, and our neighbors. I know I missed responding to many of the messages people sent me, but I read them all and appreciated them all. We are truly blessed by so many people who care about us and have been encouraging us and praying for us these past six months.

Less than a week after he was injured, they were transferring him to Walter Reed. Usually things don’t move that fast from what I was told, but he was strong and stable enough for transport. On June 14th, they loaded him on a plane and booked my flight. We landed in the D.C. area around the same time and that’s where we’ve been for the majority of the past six months.

Right now we’re still waiting for Justin’s left leg to finish healing. Sometimes it gets discouraging seeing so little progress with it. Please pray that it will heal up and Justin can get things got with a prosthetic after Christmas. The right leg is doing great! He’s working closely with his physical therapist and the prosthetics people to get it to fit comfortably. He’s been able to wear it out and about and is getting used to having it. In PT, he’s been walking on it and doing exercises with it. It’s been awesome to see the progress he’s making with just one leg. So far, they’ve been able to mold the leg socket in such a way that it doesn’t aggravate the weird bone growth (H.O. – I mentioned it previously). We’ hoping and praying that it will continue to work out so that he doesn’t need additional surgery to remove it. He’s tired of surgeries and being in the hospital and who could blame him.

Thank you all for all your love and support these past six months! It means the world to me. Different ones have called, let me vent, helped out with Corey, sent cards and notes on Facebook, brought meals when we’re in town, and prayed continuously for us. We are blessed.